Are you one of those who feel bitter with life? Feel like not talking to anyone? or, the fact that you can’t stand people around you, seeing all the corruption and evil in society, family and friends? It can also happen that you feel your family members are doing many unislamic things, causing you to have a dislike attitudes towards them.Whilst at most of the times, there is no smile, laughter or happy character on your person. whereas, other times you feel you have do desires to live life, anymore. Or, do not find pleasures in the halal things of life. It may be even, you feel depressed, not always, but from time to time.
Then know that these are clear signs of extremism. When someone goes beyond the necessary needs to do struggle (mujahada) in Islam, he/she then starts to harbour negative attitudes towards life. They begin to live life with a bitter outlook. If anyone talks to them, they reply to his/her gestures, or questions in a harsh manner. They do not reply to people with respect and good attitudes. Rather, they reply very rigidly and harshly. This then has a knock on effort on their children, brothers, sisters etc. Since, whenever you speak or interact with them you are very harsh, talk with contempt and negativity. Resulting in family/friends thinking, why has this person become more harsh and rigid. Making them unhappy.
This is not a good image the person (you) are displaying. As the person who is practicing should be more welcoming, make people feel welcome and happy around them (you), NOT the other way round. Making people go farther away from deen. – As, the attitudes displayed by the practicing person is pushing the other people away from deen. On the contrary, It will make people think “If Islam or practicing Islam makes a person become like you, then i do not want to practice Islam!”
With that being said, these signs are not the signs of constriction of the heart (Qabs). Qabs is something different, some of the signs being, you feel lazy in doing GOOD deeds, to offer the five salah is a mountain for you, to carry out your daily chores is very burdensome etc. Whereas extremism here, is you feel that there is no point to living life, you look to everyone with contempt and talk to people with harsh words and attitudes.
Sometimes when a practicing person does to much of extra nawafil and extra unneccessary struggles (mujahadah) in Islam. They end up on this side of the extremism. We usually know the other side of the extremism, which is, when someone becomes a person of dunyah. They feel sad on the thought of death or do not have the slightest inclination towards Islam. However, many people do not know this side of extremism! Which is, becoming very rigid in practicing Islam. – This can also lead a person to leave deen one day. Personally speaking, the following talk (see below) which shaykh Ahmad Dabbagh gave in Ramadan was crucial for me. It opened up my mind and alhamdulillah, brought me back to the balance which the shariah requires. Evidently, the deen and dunya both being required in life!
The teachings on extremism are taken from Syyiduna Abdul Wahid ibn Hashir (ra). Who is buried in Fez, Morocco. Next to Syyiduna Abdul Azeez Dabbagh.
I would highly recommend you to watch at least the first 30mins of the following talk. It will definitely open your mind and help you to come out of the current state you may be in. That being, either a person who is the slave of dunya or the extremist in practicing Islam.